Never trust a white man, Never **** a Jew, Never sign a contract, Never rent a pew. Don't enlist in armies; Nor marry many wives; Never write for magazines; Never scratch your hives. Always put paper on the seat, Don't believe in wars, Keep yourself both clean and neat, Never marry ******. Never pay a blackmailer, Never go to law, Never trust a publisher, Or you'll sleep on straw. All your friends will leave you All your friends will die So lead a clean and wholesome life And join them in the sky.