Lying on the beach Surrounded by murmurs Of conversation Children laughing at play And the soft rustle above Of heart-shaped leaves Dancing in a brisk breeze.
All once familiar Yet now foreign, It occurs to me , That I no longer fit, Have ceased belonging In that comfortable way Of former times When you loved me
I no longer fit In the world of couples Though they kindly try To include me If only occasionally It just isn't the same Any longer
Feeling fragmented I dole out bits of myself Almost stingily Guarding carefully My inmost thoughts Smiling as if all is As it should be But it isn't And maybe never was
When you were here I felt safe and whole For the first time ever Secure, wanted, needed Now I am a puzzle piece Of an odd shape That no longer fits In the larger scheme Of humanity
Perhaps I have lived All these years In a mindset Of childish fantasies Now suddenly dashed Like letting go unwillingly Of Santa and the Easter Bunny Maybe this is Life Seen without benefit Of rose-colored glasses Maybe, maybe not