Don't worry... When the tears start to fall down your cheeks from your eyes I feel you. Unlike the betrayal that stays personal to you. I still feel you like fresh new wounds like a knife that cuts. Straight into the flesh so that its piecing cuts. Right into the heart where there are all those arteries so that it bleeds. My empathy for a buck. Budded on and your pain with no restitution like a buyer who buys as if but to only become what an advocate is turning to agree with a judge. You swelling of anger in full blossom because of comparison futile like a terrible storm. I can only be at a loss for words while you stay abandoned lost at sea. We will never see the hurts. But I can have my pity for you and hide it so well. So you can never say don't pity you. A generous offer for two arms to hug you but you scream don't touch me. I can say sadly too I remember not wanting to be touched. But how shameful I admit I offer hand me down smiles and will only nod in a failure to wit affirmation. But you were right when you held your head up high. I will never know violation. Remorse in my eyes as the winds blows every single moment in the measurements of time to the rhythm of the same words. Seemingly to say move on. But we only live day by day and you will suffer it with your eyes open in every minute. The shadows that lurk like a threat to not sleep safe. If there could be healing in memory I would suggest you stay locked away and hidden in a ocean of nostalgia and never want to be seen or heard of again. But you have your home where you like to rest in relying on certain impulse and there are you're own wolves and lions in your den and you stay safer in knowing you could **** for a living once of tears if cause by a miracle. Or you could protect everything dear unanswered question to unasked for prayers. Because you could've had what you first prayed for from when you were very young. A perfect life and a dream but now circumstances are the cliche we receive for you and nervousness as our system for relief after excuses. I mask my pain in trying to seem intelligent with throw away liquor I come to hope to be weak enough to drink everyday. So you find your grip onto something worth it to spend your time and attention on and never let go. Just know that everything ugly in this world at some points vanish and there will be another dawn.