It quivers out of my system
In tangible shudders
And slamming heartbeats.

Some nights,
I should wake up screaming
But I know what nightmares feel like

When I walk out of my bedroom
And everybody's acting normal,
I have to remember that
They didn't know I was crying

I always play my sad songs first
So I remember that there is an absolute certainty
That someone else feels like I do

I miss the dull numbness
Right before I break down
Where I can't feel anything
At all