We used to smoke, we used to spend time
like it was as precious as your last paycheck.

I loved you because
you were present, you got every joke
and heard every sigh. The few, small times
you were there, my god, were
you there.

Like a child, presence comes at a cost.
You broke everything.
Peter pan complex, your complexion
was dark and light
like your mood.

Love me like
I'm not crazy. Pretend I'm not sad
nor desperate.
My self esteem is as high
as we are.

I don't exist to be beautiful enough
for you.
I will never be beautiful enough
for you.

I gave you my time, the most
valuable thing I have. All I have to give.
Besides my body, but
that stopped counting
years ago.

Part of me knows
you cannot love another
living, breathing being. You
hate yourself.

So you smoke my ****
while I fall in love with you.

You could have had me
when you had me
but now it's too late.

There isn't enough alcohol in this
beautiful world to make me
******* again.

If you need me, I'll be here
enjoying the present, listening
to our favorite song, smoking
all our memories.