In Grade 9 my shoulder broke under the
weight of my backpack
No joke I
found a dulling bump on the blade of my shoulder
Stress fracture, the doctor said after they
irradiated me to
make sure it wasn't cancer

maybe it's because I was small and frail and alive on
500 calories my daily bread I
thought I was strong broken
bones grow back stronger but I can
feel it all crumbling away I can
taste the gritty calcium in my cheeks i can
feel cracks surfacing like a tree exploding in winter sharp
like a gunshot frightening exhilarating

they called it a stress fracture but this is a stress fracture and
far more dangerous she says to
hand in the assignment today or it's a zero and i
pull it to cover my face newly smeared with concealer to
mask 5 minutes' ago tears in the bathroom but it's no use they
sting they bubble out like acid i am the only
girl in the calculus class and they just congratulated me on my
ability to handle the hardest class load the 2 other kids quit on but what
they don't know is I can't i
got a 34 on something else i
thought I did good and the muscles
on my back don't mean anything and my sparring ability with a plastic pipe-sword doesn't mean anything and i can't do it anymore i
thought I did good i
thought i could handle it i
was going to show them i was strong

i was going to show myself i was strong.