Nov 2010
I walk this trail trepidaciously, ever fearful that my next step will be the pit into which I'm confident I'll fall.
Being this pessimistic comes so easily; like the changing of the tides I go from high to low almost every single day.
Yet, I can't say that I've ever been happier.
Content to live day to day; month to month; never planning and always partying.
There's too much about which to worry and all I have is time now, so the worries flood my thoughts, overturning any left over hoes and dreams, sending them crashing to the bottom of my empty heart.
Nothing is able to grow here, as if an atomic blast razed the earth, charring its rocky surface and melting it to glass.
Being this pessimistic comes so easily; like the changing of the tides I go from high to low almost every single day.
Yet, I can't say that I've ever been happier.
Content to live day to day; month to month; never planning and always partying.
There's too much about which to worry and all I have is time now, so the worries flood my thoughts, overturning any left over hoes and dreams, sending them crashing to the bottom of my empty heart.
Nothing is able to grow here, as if an atomic blast razed the earth, charring its rocky surface and melting it to glass.
These song always make make me feel the same. Every time I listen to them, the same nostalgic sense of optimism; that peculiar feeling that everything is alright washes over me like a tide crashing on a rocky outcrop, slowly softening my rough edges.
But the knowledge still remains: I am a rock, no matter how smooth, I am always hardened and stubborn. Useless as I am.
But the knowledge still remains: I am a rock, no matter how smooth, I am always hardened and stubborn. Useless as I am.
