i am surrounded by beauty
that should overwhelm my soul
by sleepy sunlight
and wispy air that carries dainty secrets
to the clouds
by a perfect children's book sky
and flowers in colors so fluid
i fear if touched
they would leave wet paint on my fingertips
the sounds of summer
are in reach of my breath
and yet
i am pale and cold
and i fear each coming day
like the plague.

(and the colors are slowly greying and hardening beneath my hands)