All the bright flames
In my memory
No longer satisfy.

I burn and ache
With the feeling
That those probably weren't real.

I doubt I can find someone
Whole enough to match me.

I want intellect
I want grace
I want beauty
I want sensitivity
But most of all
I want a love that's real.

The absence of you is more painful
Than anyone's absence
Because in truth
You don't exist yet.

I gasp and sob
And wish you'd just appear
And help me focus on something
Other than my loneliness.