He draws a drag
Of his Newport
Staring up at me with
Those knives he calls eyes

My stomach twists and
I can taste the
***** in my throat
From the
Disease we call
Love

I study his appearance
Thinking of how beautiful
The folds in his baggy jeans
Really are

My opinion is biased
I'm sure it's hideous
But I've always found a way
To see the beauty in him
No matter how hard he
Tried to hide it

Love

I try to scratch the word
Out of my brain
But it's no use

How happy I would be
If I could just
Live alone
With a million cats
And slowly progress
Into madness


And when he
Leaves
Because his cigarette has
Dwindled down to
The filter

It rips me in half
And my heart bursts
Into flame
Then to ash

Only to be regenerated
When he walks
Back outside
And slices my veins
With his words
It's freezing out here,
You going inside?

I prepare for the worst
Take a few steps
A few deep breaths
And concentrate on the
Pulse from
My internal
Bleeding, broken
Phoenix