Fame and fortune sadly eluded me,
I live such an average life,
Not much exciting ever happens,
Oh just pass me the ****** knife!

I know I ought not moan and gripe,
It's likely my own mistake,
There were golden opportunities,
I had no confidence then, to take.

More I dwell upon this thing called fame,
One thing's pretty clear,
If the whole world knows who you are,
There's no privacy, my dear.

Paparazzi camped outside your home,
From morning , noon to night,
Trying to catch a random photograph,
Of you looking quite a fright.

Maybe I'm better as I am,
Just living in my dreams,
Perhaps on the other side, you know,
The grass is never quite as green.