You have hurt me
By judging how I grieve.
Still, I should not have lashed out.
My heart has been a dark abyss
I find myself loveless
Both in giving and in receiving it.
It is not fair how I am acting
But neither is what is happening.
My life has crumbled before my eyes
He was not supposed to die
And I cling to guilt and sadness
Like bitter friends
As they are all I have left.
This is not meant to be
A wasted apology
But I am sorry
For acting so selfishly
And for simply
Becoming a new, more sinister
Lonelier version of me.