The insides of my eyelids
Are tattooed with the
Scars of my soul
I close my eyes and
The slides click into place
Rapidly flashing before me
Colliding violently
Within the tunnel of my vision
The images
Gouge out my eyes
Drill into my skull
Haphazardly, they
Caress
Manipulate
Assault
My mind
I watch this show before me
Helpless
Unable to lift my eyes
Unable to wake from this
Terror

But
Suddenly I am awake
Alive
Breathing in real time
Seeing in real time

And I can still feel it
The distinctive touch of
His hands
On mine
Pushing down
Halting my fight
His fingers
Digging into my wrist
Squeezing
The life escaping from inside me
As his grasp gets
Tighter
And Tighter
And Tighter
My bones
Cracking under
His brute force
Yes
I can feel it

All day I walk around
And I feel this
Suffocating hold
And I swear
People can see it
The marks he has left

But
I really don't care
If people see
I just can't stand
That feeling
Those indents
The pressure
I feel it and

I can't stand it