"You can't win the war if your mind is always starting the fight"
I stop cold in my tracks upon hearing this.
My heart thumps slowly,
my mind is blank.
"win the war"?
By this time in my life
the idea of winning the war inside
is so foreign
I hardly process it.

"win the war"
I search inside and find ruins,
the war ended long ago,
it raged filthy
and strong
and deep
and my frail body could not fight back.

"win the war",
nearly an insult
to my body
which is now just a tomb,
a deprived carcass
whose flesh was picked off
by the crows
long before I was told it was possible to
"win the war"

The war took my mind
swallowed my soul
drowned my heart
and doused the air in flames.

There is no longer a war to win,
only a forgotten soldier to bury.