i stood outside today,
to get away from you.
winter isn't over.
it continues to snow.
you came to me,
not out of choice,
but to return something.
and i looked into the sky
i refused to acknowledge you
with my eyes.
i didn't want
to change my mind.

i wanted
to become one
with the sky,
away from you.
so you'd see the snow
in resemblance
to how my heart is reacting
to your bipolar climates
of personality.
so you woudln't
see the hollowing look
within my eyes.
i'm tired of this weather.

i told you
something that hadn't been sitting right.
i wanted to throw the words
into your ears.
i wanted to scream them.
so you weren't mistaken.

i told you
words that are meant for you
i don't know if they will change you
i don't expect them to at all.

but i told you
that i was done trying to be your friend,
in a voice hardly above a whisper
as if my own body
was shutting itself down
muting the words into silence.
i let them be spoken.

i told you
i meant it.

you told me
you didn't hear me.
but your eyes across the room
told me otherwise.