as the rain washes away the pain
of yesterday,
i, face planted on my pillow,
rub my foot against each other
to fight the cold.
depressed and grieving,
i grew tired of dreaming.
my dreams died with you.
the rain poured hard outside,
but i cant hear its beauty.
as water drips from my window pane,
the tears flow,
with it all our love and promises.
i tried to get out of bed,
but its the only sanctuary i have right now.
its warmth and comfort reminded me
of your affections.
its scent and feel were just like
that of your skin.
i traveled back to memory lane,
i crashed in the emptiness
of its street.
i cant bear the deafening silence it
produced,
the picture it portrayed doesn't seem right
without you.
so i snapped back to reality.
though you were the only color
in my black and white world,
i need to paint a canvas of beauty
for my own sake.
slowly i turned around,
face no longer planted on my pillow.
i gradually opened my eyes
and wipe the tears away.
i faced the ceiling and looked
at its emptiness.
i don't wanna be an empty space
where people stare,
i don't wanna be on the receiving end
of your meaningless gaze.
so i let out the last of my pain and anger.
gathering what's left of my strength
and pride
i got out of bed,
got in my jeans and shirt,
went outside and
smelled the air.
the coldness of an after rain feel
brought out a chill.
i walked towards the nearest coffeehouse
and for the first time i tasted and smelled the
beauty of life in a
single cup.