i've been living in the shadows
in the small crevice in the back of my closet
next to the shoe box filled with love notes and memories

i've been seeing things through a ***** window
a window in my cell
where everything i touch is cold and sends shivers through my spine

i've been sleepwalking through this 'life'
as if it is my own
but i don't recognize the face i see in the mirror

i've been loving
every gentle, comely face that lay in their despair
and they run, they sprint, as i lay helpless

i've been trying, caring, wanting
and each and every time i am reminded
there is nothing good for me here

this isn't reality