You've heard the story of Goldilocks
And the bears that chased her away
But now it's time to tell the truth
'Cause it didn't really happen that way

Goldilocks weighed four hundred pounds
She'd eat anything in sight
And It didn't matter what it was
She still had to have one bite

The whole town knew of her appetite
So they locked their food in storage
And that just left those poor little bears
Who was just trying to cool their porridge

Now she could smell food a mile away
For she had an amazing snout
But she waited to make certain
Those bears had ventured out

She didn't just break one of those chairs
She actually broke all three
Remember, she weighed four hundred pounds,
And was as fat as she could be?

Well, she ate up all their porridge
And anything else she could find
Ofcourse that made her sleepy
With only one thing on her mind

She wandered into the bedroom
And broke each one of their beds
So she curled up on the floor to sleep
With three pillows under her head

While she slept, those bears came home
And they were as hungry as could be
Did I mention she broke the remote control
To the bear's big screen tv?

Anyway, the bears had finally had it
That's all that they could take
In their rage they didn't notice
That goldilocks was now awake

So they trapped her in the corner
And were poised for the attack
But goldilocks was still hungry
And was looking for a snack

Needless to say she ate those bears
I know this story seems crude
But I'm just trying to warn you all
To make sure you hide your food