You said you needed to find yourself before you could be with someone else.
What kind of bullshit is that?
That you knew exactly who you were and at the first sight of me
you lost yourself then found yourself in me.
Making me believe that I was your one and only
To then find out id be one and lonely.
Leaving rigid thoughts to never leave,
Imprints of your hands stay carved between my knees,
Left a void inside my chest
and the feeling of nothingness that lies between my breasts.
Missing the reflection of the sunlight’s rays that shined from your eyes
back into mine.
Tainted ticks sing from off my hour glass figure,
I was a waste of your time.
‘cause you wanted a blow
But I wanted to blow your mind,
Graffiti my name into your memory
Until I was all you could see
And you couldn’t breathe, needing me to stay alive.
Resting my head on the pillow known as tissue to my swollen eyes,
crushed.
Your ice cold words playback lines inside my head
that jam to themselves on the same beat as my heart
does.
Trying to find my truth,
Your truth,
And the REAL truth that separate my love from your lust.
Didn’t need you anyway ‘cause you were unworthy of us.
So all that’s left of you is hatred from a ball point pen
Crying through my paper.
Filling the empty spaces we were ’spose to fill together
Erasing doodles of your name written in my margins
Waiting for the next one so I can begin this process again.
Stored pages with words that will never truly have an end.
Maybe in another life we can try to make amends.
I’m simply wanting to be loved,
But not in bed.