i feel like my form is hollow.

no organs pulsingandthrumming, my veins drained.

empty.

the emptiness left behind after you weaved
your fingers between my ribs and slipped
your hands around my heart, only to leave
a gaping hole when you were wrenched away
from me.

every day I wake
and look at myself with utter
disgust
every inch of my skin,
every pore and strand of hair is
dripping with the grease and slime you left behind,
coating
my ears
and my eyes
and my mouth
and my heart
altering my perception of reality.

you.
you built me up with
your sweet, slick words
and melting eyes
and rough fingers at my waist

the taste of bitter coffee and cigarettes ringing in my ears

your presence, so near and secret, created a world
outside the struggle and need for validation I fought through

a world built up on glass spires
of innocence
and desire
and longing
and secrecy
and need.