My only source of happiness
is fueled by vivid dreams of
ending myself
the relief of being overcome by an
empty nothingness taking with it my greatest
fears and challenges ripping them from
my view
the simple thought of
a handful of moments being the cure
the cure for all of my pain is
horrifyingly calming
never did i think i would find peace
in my own self destruction
but like always
lack of courage and confidence will hold me
above the water when all i can hope for is to
drown.