Susana means lily of the valley. Shoshanna, curled petals for hair and a bridged nose, pollen specked and running. I was named for Abuelita Susana, she was a leather belt and anti-semite, stinging my dad with welts until adulthood. Abuela did not mean her name until her stem shook down to dementia. curled petals for a mind, bridged heart, pollen specked and waning. The only thing she remembered was her grandson and a record player and Chiquitita. I am not like her. She was harpooned, jagging, never the lily of the valley. I am glad I have a chance to redefine Susana. A lily in a valley of infinite Susanaβs.