I smell like coffee, bruises
and insomnia
for the night I spent weeks awake
in bed,
from 12:17 to 12:32
counting heartbeats instead of seconds
and listening to
the wind, howl me reasons
to step outside.

It yelled through the blinds
where the window
doesn't latch shut
and picked up the edge
of the goose feather
hollow
to remind me
that no one else was up.