When you return to the world from this place,
I found, nothing makes sense.
I looked around and saw boxes
look outside your window and tell me which meets your eye more
- 90 degree angles or  360 circles?
It overwhelmed me with frustration and sadness
this seeming preference for an unnatural shape.
I remember,
I felt like I would prefer death than have to be
a part of this reality
one
second
longer.

My friend,
she was waiting for me, she knew, she understood
egg salad for me,
I drank entire jar of pickle juice.
Slowly I picked myself up
dusted myself off and got involved with life again.

Starting to fully transform into the woman I am now
and the woman I am still becoming.
Figure things out as it is time for you to.
You fall down, you get back up and try again,
realize no one knows you as well as you do and be glad of that.
For we make discoveries every day,
every day we change
and become a newer person.
You cannot change according to what others think or want,
this is your life.
No one way is right, no one way is wrong -
it's how it works for you and you alone.
Just try not to hurt anyone.

I cannot take personally every perception introduced into my world,
what is arrogance to some,
is hope and hard work to others,
what is instability to one,
is flowing and letting change happen as it will to another.
There are so many counterbalances in life,
why stick to one dogma?
refuse to stick with a permanent label and call it done.
That label may not fit in a few years -
hell, it may not fit tomorrow,
why worry about who you're going to be tomorrow?

I want to be be who I am right now.
I have not met the person I will be yet,
you have not met the person you will be yet,
so we cannot tell each other the full truth
about who we are on a constant basis.
How can we when we truly don't know ourselves?
as we change to become a more open, calm and understanding people
you learn more about who you are and who you are becoming
moment by moment.

To be held as "I am this way or that"
is not a box I am comfortable with.
Try to put a box on me
and you'll find that it is empty -
for I'll have moved past it quite quickly.
Do not feel unstable or crazy,
feel you are exactly who you need to be for right now.
No more, no less.
Be many things
and in understanding that the universe holds many paradoxes
within it
we become more comfortable with the much smaller paradoxes
within ourselves.
I seek balance in all things.
The only thing I want to be extreme about
- is being me.