dear daddy,

                         i know you wont see this, but i want to let you know all that i'm feeling while you are gone. i feel happy. much happier than i used to. i don't feel as insecure. i have always wanted to be as confident as you were and now confidence plays one of the largest roles in my heart. when you stopped seeing me, i grew depressed. i couldn't sleep, i wrote several journal entries, and i scratched up my wrists and thighs. i got better and then i looked at my weight. i would go a few days without eating. i drank loads of water to fill me up rather than eating food. i once again, wrote journal entries keeping fasting records and tips on how to lose weight. however i did get better. i saw you a little afterwards with you and you and your girlfriend. i heard you two have had some problems; abusive problems. i pray every night that you two will work things out. when i saw you, you handed me laxatives and i couldn't tell by the look in your face whether you were kidding, so i took them into my hands, but threw them out immediately. i made a promise to myself that i wouldn't become so insecure about my weight like i used to. now that i have come face-to-face with my flaws and insecurities, the obscurity in my life has seemed to almost completely vanish. i am happy now. i am writing poems now that make me feel beautiful. i am taking pictures now. i am listening to different music now. i am playing basketball now. i am wearing long socks now.  i am wearing crop tops now. i am more social now. i can finally smile now and although you are starting to forget about me, i am much stronger now.

                                                           ­                                          much love,
                                                           ­                                       your daughter