I stretched out on pavements at dusk
oblivious to the idea of safety in case of mindless vehicles
mindful only to the collected heat radiating into my stupid skin.

I suckle on the bones of my mother's memory
her nails running up my spine used to soothe me.
Now they leave puncture wounds.
Sweet breastmilk that one day turned irritable and absent-minded;
she slapped me when I refused to drink.

My haughty attitude or pouted lip:
the only way I knew how to ask for help.
Didi you hear me?
Still, I suffer, scream in silence.

Maybe I seek acceptance from men,
but I want a woman to know that it's me who is in control.
I wanted approval daddy,
I'm not an object for your manipulation, mother.

Stupefied, I stoop, slouch through short doorways
that accept men who don't hold their heads high.
I slink into outstretched arms meant for other people.
Tonight, please. Tonight, just. Hold me.