that the girl I was
could become somebody so
different.
So suddenly
      abruptly
      uncalled for.
Never dreamed I could become this.

I like to say
society is to blame.
The urge to be beautiful can
capture you so tight if you’re even a
little unsure.
Society is not to blame.
I am to blame.
I am to blame.

That innocence was so eager
to be gone,
to be mature,
to be adult.
Rushed out of it and I fell
                                     fell
                                     fell
and became corrupt.

Can’t say I didn’t enjoy it.
Oh it became what I kept for as my pride.
Reaped as a casualty.
Rushed into a much too adult world.
Under that farcical act I knew nothing.
Pain follows like an ex ever since.
Thrived in it regardless, embracing it.

I thought I deserved it.