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Feb 2014
4 years old, I found her
Silence surrounded her
She wasn't moving, still as stone
After all the soothing, I went home

I asked my father if it was normal
That her death meant nothing to me
I had to bother, he was too formal
But finally he set it free
No
The only words he said that day
Echo in my head on endless replay

Romance and smiles we shared
But all the while I was prepared
The hollow monster of endless regret
Had followed me as it will till death

I felt nothing for her as I knew I would
I did everything for her as best I could
Only a show, a beautiful dance
Nothing true ever came from that romance
After all was done and we parted ways
I asked if it was normal, only to hear her say
No
The only words she said that day
Like I didn't deserve what she had to say

A fun game, not to be played often
A game that never softened
To be or not to be, was the goal
And tonight I finally have the answer
As this torture took its toll
And sadness spread like cancer
I watched the world from 35 feet up
And wanted so bad to jump

I made my choice and was finally free
It's a beautiful world for the last to see
An angel found me as I slipped away
I took a moment just to say
Is it normal, to feel only sadness and hate
She only stood silent, then, hand in hand, we walked away
Matthew Nichols
Written by
Matthew Nichols  Ozark, Arkansas
(Ozark, Arkansas)   
431
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