They'd sooner leave their cosseting...*

I am tired.
I have tried so many times
to write the most eloquent,
perfectly ambiguous
words I can conjure up.
I have failed every time.

Today, I am tired.
Today, there is no room for ambiguity.
There is no room to write that
"the wind sounds like a death rattle,
the grass tastes of the razors edge,
there is no sun, today."

I have not love,
just a swirl of ghosts I once loved
I cannot touch them anymore
I do not want to touch them anymore:
they refuse to leave me alone
and I refuse to let them go.
They're all happier without me,
I know this to be true.

I am so tired,
my ambiguity gutters.

I am a sad, sorry child
in the cradle of my youth
searching for happiness
but happiness never comes.