There were nights long ago
That the flowers fell asleep with me
And the moon sung a lullaby
That rained silver dollars
On our heads
A few years later
Something came over me
I got ready to go to bed
And I crawled between the covers
Smiling like a fool
But once the lights turned off
I had anxiety attacks all night
Until I miraculously fell asleep
Then quite a few years after that
A couple hours before my head hit the pillow
My lungs would tighten
And my heart would constrict
Around my broken feelings
Because I was afraid of seeing you
Mingling with my dreams
I would breath heavy
Under the shower water
And choke on the mint of my toothpaste
Until I had to suffocate
In my pillow
Muffled gasps masked by sweat
And fear
Just last night
I had a dream about you
It was vivid as daylight
Crisp as snow
We were lovers again
Except I got revenge on you
And made you miss what you
Could only have once
And the attacks are getting progressively worse
I find myself sitting in classes
With an expressionless face
Dead eyes and a posture to match
I hope you can see me
But forget about me when I die
And buried in the cold earth
With the flowers asleep with me
And the moon crying silver dollars
On our heads