There’s a lot to be said
For silences.

Spaces open up between heartbeats.
I’m throwing my words against barriers.
Bouncing from Mandible to Maxillary
And retreating back to vocal chords
Rubbed raw by screams.

I have been trying to tell you
That what I have to say is not
What you think.

But pulling teeth apart feels like
Tearing flowers from their beds-
Their petals from their stems-
And discarding them beneath feet
Anyway.

I have been trying to stay silent.
For what I have to say is not
What you think.

I can no longer tell if it is
A lack of things to utter, or too many.
But each contained within throat
Rattles against breath
And how you cannot hear, I
Know not.

They scream louder than
A pounding heart
And at times that echoes, unbidden.
I think they each race the other,
Tempted with reaching ears-

Does the head win,
Or the heart?

I could lead from silence to sound,
Or elsewise
And still feel confined
To passages of speech.
Monologues ringing off instead of
Dialogue.

Confined to self, and always
Yearning
To touch you

We’ve been taught that
Actions speak louder than words,
And I travel with back steps
Hoping –

Perhaps silence will sound loudest