I almost forgot you-
and then it hit me as I sat
staring out the window,
searching an empty nightscape.

Recollections of your tenderness
soothing me from echoes of your voice
and the lightest touches of your hands.

I wanted them on me
and I wanted you near me so badly
I was willing to pay any price.

Intoxicated, stumbling from shadow to shadow-
quietly, quietly so not to be heard.
Sneaking sideways into rooms
covertly, covertly so not to be seen.

A whole spring to spring romance
hidden beneath facades we both struggled to maintain
in our appropriate adult lives that
were killing us slowly from the inside.

And then you were leaving with her-
I was staying with him.
And I was jealous and heartsick
to realize I was just your passing phase
of hunger for passion, not where your heart lived.

It’s to my credit only I never let you have me,
and I can go on knowing I will always be your siren;
But you will never be mine again.
A new ring on my finger promises
a love I have never known and one I knew
you could have never given me.