Dec 2013
Am I worth keeping around? Truly? Then why isn't anything I do right to you? Why can't you accept what I've chosen for myself? Am I not intelligent enough to chose the right thing? You sit there criticizing me, yet say you're proud? You take out all your anger on me, yet say you love me? I don't understand. How can you say I'm one thing but then say I'm something completely different? Is it me or you?
How can you expect me to stay as you push me away while you chase after something else? Am I not worth it? You say you do it for me but when something goes wrong you say its my fault? I didn't make you come, so how's is your decision my fault? I can't say these things out loud because of how you'll react? And yet you wonder why I'm not completely open with you when all you do is point out that everything I say is wrong. How I won't speak my mind, but when I do you drop me to the floor. I'm smarter than a dog, I learn that doing something that led you to hit me, will most likely lead you to do it once more.
You sit there talking down to me....You have no right to criticize me, not after what you've done, what you did, not even last night. You get mad at me when you tell me these things and I don't jump for joy. I'm sorry if you feel guilt as you do these things, but that's not my fault. That is your own conscience speaking.
Why must you take everything out on me? Is this my purpose? If so, I'd rather not exist, because it would be less painful. Not existing could never hurt more than the disappointment I see in your eyes, the anger in your voice, or the daggers you call words.
I bang my head against the wall trying to figure out where you and I stand. Who are you? Who am I? Are you right or am I? Why does everything fade into a gray blur when it comes to me and you? I sit wondering if things will get better, or if that's another false promise you gave me to cling to? Is anything you've told me true? Can I hold onto any of the promises, or should I be warned by the venom that you spew in my direction when things don't go the way you wanted...Can you see what you're doing to me?
I'm so torn, I don't think I can be mended. But I never act on these things, not the way most people would...I guess you could say my undying respect and loyalty for you are some of my more pathetic traits. So here I'll remain, with my mind melting in it's fiery turmoil, standing beside you regardless...
How can you expect me to stay as you push me away while you chase after something else? Am I not worth it? You say you do it for me but when something goes wrong you say its my fault? I didn't make you come, so how's is your decision my fault? I can't say these things out loud because of how you'll react? And yet you wonder why I'm not completely open with you when all you do is point out that everything I say is wrong. How I won't speak my mind, but when I do you drop me to the floor. I'm smarter than a dog, I learn that doing something that led you to hit me, will most likely lead you to do it once more.
You sit there talking down to me....You have no right to criticize me, not after what you've done, what you did, not even last night. You get mad at me when you tell me these things and I don't jump for joy. I'm sorry if you feel guilt as you do these things, but that's not my fault. That is your own conscience speaking.
Why must you take everything out on me? Is this my purpose? If so, I'd rather not exist, because it would be less painful. Not existing could never hurt more than the disappointment I see in your eyes, the anger in your voice, or the daggers you call words.
I bang my head against the wall trying to figure out where you and I stand. Who are you? Who am I? Are you right or am I? Why does everything fade into a gray blur when it comes to me and you? I sit wondering if things will get better, or if that's another false promise you gave me to cling to? Is anything you've told me true? Can I hold onto any of the promises, or should I be warned by the venom that you spew in my direction when things don't go the way you wanted...Can you see what you're doing to me?
I'm so torn, I don't think I can be mended. But I never act on these things, not the way most people would...I guess you could say my undying respect and loyalty for you are some of my more pathetic traits. So here I'll remain, with my mind melting in it's fiery turmoil, standing beside you regardless...
