I wish I could go hours
Without checking my phone
To see if I've missed anything,
Or if anything missed me.

I wish I could go days
Without speaking to anyone
To see if these thoughts inside my head
Could just quiet down.

I wish I could go months
Without thinking of myself
To instead become more selfless, engaged in
Helping others.

I wish I could go years
Without this hatred that I feel
Towards myself and everyone else,
Maybe then I could gain some inner peace.

But people start to worry,
They murmur, whisper-talk, "What's wrong with her,
Why is she not responding, to us, to anything.
Is it a phase? Is she okay?"

I wish they would realize
That being silent is helping,
Healing.
They just don't understand what it means.

I wish they would understand
Going silent is saving me,
And that I wasn't all that put together in the first place,
When I reacted to every thought, movement, or action made.

I wish I could tell them
That I'm not alright,
That I'm tired of talking, replying, being a functional human,
But it seems I've lost my voice.