If You Really Knew Me
You would know,
That I have no ambitions.

I lack ambition because
I lack the trust and belief in myself
needed to achieve my
desired accomplishments.

If You Really Knew Me
You would know, that I
Live my life, jealous
Of what others have accomplished
Instead of making my own
Accomplishments.

I hate that
I cannot feel anything anymore
Except pain or emptiness.
Jealousy.

If You Really Knew Me
You would know that
People used to tell me
I was the sweetest person
They knew.
Now...there's nothing to say.

I am afraid it has been
So long since I have been
That person...I don't know
If she will ever come back.

If You Really Knew Me
You would know
I am terrified
I will waste my whole life
Wishing and regretting the
Things I never did.

I am afraid my fear
Of change
Will continue to consume me.
That it will continue to hold me back
From accomplish anything.
Instead, I will continue to lead
A spiteful life, sick with jealousy
For those who have the courage
I do not.

If You Really Knew Me
You would know that
I don't know where I want my life to be.
That I don't plan my future
Because I am not sure if I even have one.

I am afraid to die a nobody.
To leave this earth, having done nothing
Worthy of being here.

If You Really Knew Me
You would know that I want to be remembered
For making a difference.
I am tired of just sitting around
Wishing my life away.

That I long to be different.
That I pray one day I will
Be able to break that tight chain
My lack of ambition has on me.
So that I am no longer holding myself back
From changing the path of my future.

If You Really Knew Me**
You would know that I am
Simply human.
I wonder:
Why it is so hard
For others to admit that
To themselves?