I used to be a happy carefree person, full of life and love.
The suddenly I realized
I was never really happy.
This is not the life I want to live.
I wanted a future and chance
I wanted goals and fulfillment.
The life I was living was not going to fill my needs.
I was in this dark drooling downward spiral of depression and I needed someone
but after all of the glamour was gone, the drinks were done, and the smoke had faded.
Everyone left right along with it.
I had the love of a family
That I barely had seen.
From 800 miles away these people expressed their care for me.
To me, this love was foreign.
I was to used to being used and stepped on.
I felt to alone and sad.
But then
A light
Shined on me in my darkest time.
I realized that these people I held onto didn't even care for me.
I had been drained dry and left to rot, but the voices from miles away came to save me.
Here I am.
Trying to be normal, for once in 3 years I am actually happy.
And I want it to stay this way for a long time.