when my love scabs over
i peel myself open again
bleeding just feels so real
and lately i've sunken into myself
coming back empty handed and hearted
still love you, still hate you
still suffocated
but no one can ever tell
and i weigh every interaction
against my worth
just to free fall
into delusion
just to break even
i sell my soul
splintering bones
playing along despite the intrusion
just to feel decent
i ignore the signals
from my brain to my body
screaming to run
so do tell again
what it is that i need
or what is it that i should do
or how it just isnt ever enough