Me an Jack we out drinking
got a taxi into town
for to have a pint of Guiness
our sorrows for to drown

Well one led to another
as from pub to pub we went
pretty soon we couldn't speak straight
and our money we'd all spent

So we couldn't get a taxi
and the buses were all done
nothing left to do but walk it
and hope we find our way back home

So we walked around in circles
then the depot we did find
sure we could borrow a bus to get us home,
we'd just leave a not behind

Now Jack has pinched a car or two
in times of desperate need
so it only seemed too fitting
he be the one to do the deed

So I stood there like a sentry
as Jack he climbed the gate
He said he'd be two minutes
so I wouldn't long to wait.

But after twenty minutes waiting
I shouted "whats the trouble Jack?"
He said "the bus for Ballyneety
is parked right at de back"

So I told him not to worry
and what to do for best
"Take the bus for Knockananty,
we'll just have to walk the rest."