i don't believe in fairies. i believe in the magic fairies make. i do believe in faeries. they're grotesque and very real. what is the difference between fairies and faeries? the letters, of course. and as i say those words, i feel a huge slap coming on from all the kids in the universe. kids. i don't believe in kids. i believe in the disaster they create. i do believe in orphans. they're not as happy as you are during Christmas. they're not as free as the wings of an unstrapped bird, waiting to be shot by a silly old man in a rampage with an illegally purchased gun.