I am NOT my old self
A poem- By: Olivia Williams
——————

You still blabber on,
as if I haven’t changed yet.
You’ve bended the way I've grown  
You’ve put out my steady fire—
my true flame—
When I fought to make that new one,
In the first place.  

You think I haven’t mended
You think I won’t have “bad” days
You think I’m still following all the demands,
That old cycle,
The betrays,  
And my old ways.
Down the worn-soaked path of love and hate.


I am fighting for independence,
I am fighting to be free,
Sure, I've made mistakes!
BUT that SHOULD NOT define me.

I am strong enough,
I am loved enough,
I am brave enough,
I am outspoken,
I am ME.
mistakes shouldn’t be the “NEW” me.
I shouldn’t have to mend,
To be the daughter,
You wish I could be.

I'm admitting to my past.
I've made lots of mistakes,
I’ve had to learn the hard way,
I accept my consequences.
I am old enough to recognize,
That I'm being hurt,
And I should be stronger than that,

It’s funny how you remember the worst,
When I’ve already changed.
It’s funny how you can recount,
ALL my mistakes.
It’s funny how you pretend it still affects you,
It was many years ago.
Or how it might have been a month ago,
But you won’t let it go.
You pretend my worst is all I am,
Like I’m just a pessimistic kid.

you still haven’t seen,
All parts of me.
I'm MUCH more than that,
I still keep secrets,
The good-kind at least.
Like the birthday surprises,
Or some of my beliefs.

Believe what you want,
Replay what comforts you,
When you fall asleep at night.
DON'T expect to see the girl you think of,
Because I've been more than ”changed”.

I’ve outgrown my old skin
Reshaped my life
Like a mold
I’ve risen above the stars
When you look up
You won’t see one tiny star
You’ll see a galaxy of light

I’m NOT my old self
And you should know that now
I want to be better
So..come..join me now.