This is less fun now
(it’s not)

I scrolled tumblr in the 2010s
Stuffing my gums with the pictures and prose
Guzzling gifsets until they needed to pump my stomach
Eyes bloodshot
Couldn’t stop yawning
(You know that’s a sign of heart failure)

I can’t end up like her
You thought you were dying once
(That was last month)
Holding your breath to see if your heart would slow

But twelve years later
No smarter
Still scrounging for stories on forums
Like I’ll feel that again
Are they less relatable now?

I should be letting go of the log
I’m over it now
(Don’t think about how this never goes away)
The pulsing behind my ears will cease by 9am