I killed the girl I used to be
I haven’t buried her yet
I stare at her rotting corpse, in the corner of my room,
of my heart, where she rests
unmoving, unbreathing


I killed her kindness because her kindness
wasn’t killing anything
and I needed to be deadly
purge the weakness from my body
with poison

it burns me but hopefully, it hurts him too

give me venom so I can bite back
better yet toxic skin
so touching me means death.

make me dangerous so I can
laugh when I want to scream

she was too soft
so I shot her through the heart
and it didn’t make it unbreak.
funny how that works

I’ve crawled my way out
of her shattered remains
gruesome, but that’s what survival is
surviving

the changes I have wrought upon myself can only be considered ******
second degree
malicious but not meticulous

I killed the girl I used to be
I killed her because he couldn’t
now I’m something new
something I can’t quite name
don’t recognize

but at least he hasn’t touched me