I know myself.
I am not a gold digger, nor am I a materialistic woman.
But I’ve come to learn this:
when a man truly wants to provide,
he simply will—
no excuses, no alibis, no “what ifs.” Just action.

So the question is:
What made me choose my partner over and over again?
Simple.
Because when he wants to,
he would.

I met someone years ago—
someone who, in hindsight, couldn't even provide for himself.
So how could I expect him to provide for me?

Point taken.
I was serious about the relationship.
He wasn’t.
While I was busy holding it all together,
he was out there fooling around,
treating my loyalty like a game.

I felt like a cup of hot coffee—
left unattended.
And when he finally came back,
I had already gone cold.

But the issue was never the coffee.
It was always the one who was supposed to drink it.

I always waited for him—
until one day, I didn’t anymore.
Because time won’t wait for me,
and I can’t keep letting it pass me by
while holding on to someone
who never truly held on to me.

Maybe I’ll never learn to smile the same again.
Maybe the scars will stay a little longer.
But I know this deep in my bones:
I’ll make it through.

And if you ever decide to wait for me—
truly wait—
then maybe, just maybe,
you'll find me
not where you left me,
but somewhere stronger.