[tw: some graphic stuff yo]

sometimes i imagine
using razor blades to stab my eyes

sometimes i imagine
that with a slick knife,
i am pinned down
and slit open

i imagine lines and lines of blood on limbs
limbs that can't be soaked
no not yet
not right now
not today

i imagine
getting beat up
fresh bruises blooming my features

swollen black eye,
split lips,
teeth knocked out

i wish to suffocate
to be crushed

and to receive all the wounds i deserve