I'd kick a can as far as I could,
But I'm as empty as the thing and it does no good.

I'd smash the glass after I finished my beer,
But the shards would scatter, like my heart, I fear.

And who would clean up the mess?

I smile at the pretty girls and introduce myself,
But they see my belly and grey, so I go back on the shelf.

There is a girl; Scots-German and holy,
But my brother pursues her and I am not worthy.

And who would clean up the mess?

I'd drink up the ocean and die belly up,
But the sea would refill from when I erupt.

I've scaled my last mountain and caressed my last *****,
But, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, I crossed all my chasms.

Got to give up that ghost.