I've compared my life to so many things I've been waiting for a prince to rescue me I've been waiting for a perfect life like the ones on TV I've been waiting for some action like in the books I read I've been waiting and waiting but it'll never come for awhile it made me so numb I got lost and TV and books I wished I was there I wished I looked like that perfect TV actress I wished I had that perfect guy I wished I had friends that were there for me when I cried I wished for the perfect sitcom family I wished that I'd wake up to find that my life was a lie that'd wake up and that would be my life my family would be perfect I'd have so many friends I'd get the guy who looks like him someone would want me I wouldn't be alone but I always woke up in the same home day after day lost in a trance lost in these fantasies I wished were my life I wished that a dog would save my life I cried and I cried but they couldn't tell me it was alright I needed a comforting voice I needed something to live for I needed a dad who was parenting me one who gave me emotional security yes you were there but it never felt like for me I called you my mom's husband for so long it made me feel guilty but I was not wrong because while you love me you weren't the father I need so I spent my days lost in these fantasies hoping someone would save me I often thought about death I have no fear of dying these books and TV clear my mind I become numb and lose myself to a trance just to keep myself alive I always go back to these fantasies of mine I wish for perfect that will never be found I wish what will never be real so sold on fiction I'm not living I'm glued to this happiness that they find and I wish their life was mine these fantasies are nice but they are not real I live in these fantasies to forget that I'm here forget I'm alive forget I'm depressed forget all these thoughts in my head I latch on to these fantasies they I tell myself can save me stuck comparing myself to the standards I can never uphold I will never look like her I will never be sitcom happy I will never meet a prince that will make me a princess I compared myself to these fantasies I live in these fantasies I want these fantasies I will never get those fantasies