I ******* hate how even after this I still feel scared to live.
I wanted so badly to die.
And now I'm still scared to live.

I hate myself for not asking you
to city cinema.
I still have the two tickets
sitting solemnly,
knowing very well that they'll
never find their rightful owner.

Make up your ******* mind.
I wanted so badly to talk to you
One last time.

Staring patiently at your icon
with a green circle.
Because you're there,
but I was just too *******
scared.

And now I'm scared to love anyone else.
Because I know how impermanent it all is.

I wanted so badly to die,
and now the one thing I wish is that
we didn't have so much in common