i could never be alone,

but that's why i'm so terrified.

spiraling self-doubt under skylight.

to remember your face,

under every star my eyes could count.

i could never be alone,

but i changed when my mom died.

i can't handle the dark,

i can't inhale the air.

i can't take this place anymore.

but morbid curiosity keeps me livin',

and i've absorbed so much pain,

i've swallowed what terrifies me.

but i could never do it twice.