"Pffffft... man, I'm so bored. Did we smoke all the ***?"

"Nah, there's a couple of blunts' worth left. Help yourself, bro."

"Cheers, dude. You know, for an ashtray, you're not bad company. You love a good smoke, the chicks love you, dudes see you as part of the family, we've got similar tastes in music, although I know you prefer Highway to Hell to Back in Black. Either way, AC/DC are the best band in the universe. I was cleaning you the other day and noticed all the stains and remnants of wild nights from over the years. We've had our adventures, our accidents, you've borne witness to romance, pain, and life-changing events—hell, you've always been there for me. I'm sooo ******.

Where's the ***? Let's rip a couple of bongs. You know I'll always be grateful for our time together, but... alas, our friendship has to end.

Time's catching up with me, and my health comes first, so I'm moving on—moving on to vapes, and knocking getting high on the head."

"You really are ******, aren't you? Get rolling, I'm gasping for a puff."

"Right, yes... two blunts coming up."