A man once told me a story.
He was a night guard at a facility.
About how when you do something out of love it’s no longer a task.

And I figured I could try to apply that for many things I have to do.

But nowadays it seems like even out of love it’s not ok.
Dealing with the same old.
I think that’s it, it gets old.
Even for love.

Love doesn’t have to get old but I do and the things I do to.
So even out of love doing them feels bad and exhausting.
It’s not going smoothly.
I’m also feeling lost and out of options to be able to get through life again.

Cause where can I go again?
And starting again feels like trying to fix an old engine.

It runs but it’s still exhausted.
It’s never fresh and new.